5 Rules for Being Single

Have you ever found yourself Suddenly Single?

Leaving a relationship can sometimes feel like a time warp. Maybe you started dating your ex-husband at 35 and now that you are 53 the two of you are getting a divorce. Or even if you fell in love at 24 and a baby and some years later you find yourself single and 30. So much about yourself and your life has changed!

When you are not on the dating scene you will be surprised how different the rules are.

Here are a few tips to help you transition from Seriously Taken to Suddenly Single:

1. Announce your newly single status GRACEFULLY! Let the ones who matter most be the first to know, so that they are not finding out from a facebook status. Let them trickle the news down, as you know they will spill, even if they swore to secrecy. When YOU are ready; throw a cute pic of yourself up online with a clever caption like:”Getting back to just loving myself”.

2.If there is even a glimmer of hope for your relationship DO NOT BASH THAT PERSON ONLINE OR ANYWHERE ELSE! Sometimes you are upset about something but the two of you get over it with time and reconcile, you never know what the future holds. Imagine how stupid you will look if you have told the internet about that person having an STD (true or not). Just keep your mouth SHUT when it comes to vengeful slurs, no good will come of it.

3.Embrace your new found freedom.Get drunk, get a little crazy, reclaim your youth (or whatever years) that you spent in that relationship, no need to rush into a new one. Spend some time getting to know the new you and REFLECT so you do not make ANY of the same mistakes. But remember; Let Loose, but don’t BE LOOSE!

4.Fight the Urge to Contact. This is like the hardest part! Especially if you are used to talking to your ex-mate about everything, or if the two of you have children, OR if you have a great relationship with their family OR if you have 2947 mutual friends. But trust me it is important to clear your life.space of a person so that you can be confident in your decision to move on. Let the relationship GO if it is over.When people say “lets just be friends” they ARE NOT ready to be single and not ready to be w/o that person. So give yourself substantial time before considering a friendship w/an ex.

5.You can’t change the past, but you can have one hell of a future!Go find what you want. Do what you want. Try something new. Love louder, laugh louder, live louder. No need to tastelessly flaunt how many dates you are on or how quickly you found someone new, let your spirit show how much happier you are.

And I wish you good luck and much love.

Ms. Get Right

Women Like Watching Men Cheat on their Wives

March is National Women’s HisHerstory Month, which is a great time for me to quickly let you all know about my Thursday night (I’ll tie it all together I promise).

My Thursday television line-up included Parks and Recreation, Mary Mary, and Scandal.

A few things stuck out to me while watching all this delightful programming. Each of these shows have a woman as the leading role which is great, ehhh I guess. In Parks and Rec. there have been 3 weddings (if I am counting correctly), and a host of successful relationships etc. This season of Mary Mary is focused on Tina’s husband cheating on her and last night we found out Erica’s husband might have cheated too (SPOILER ALERT!), and then there is Scandal where the whole show is rape, cheating, well you know – things that are scandalous.

As someone who is still very young and a terribly, hopeless romantic I want to get married – ONCE! I am a very loyal and committed individual who expects the same in return. Watching Mary Mary (which is a reality show) and seeing a woman BROKEN because of her husband’s infidelity makes me nervous and very sympathetic for her. Seconds later turning on Scandal to see the main character glorified for sleeping with a married man, really threw me off a bit. I know that terrible things make for great TV but what bothers me most are other women’s responses to what is depicted.

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I think about BET’s Being Mary Jane, I am not a recurring viewer but I have seen ENOUGH episodes (2 to be exact) to see that the show is centered around a woman who is sleeping with or who has slept with a married man. People love that show. Week after week I see tweets and fb stats where viewers are bashing the wives, and promoting the mistress and even the cheating husband. BET even has a promotion where they are telling people to embrace their inner Mary Jane. WHAT? What does that even mean?

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My favorite responses are when people tweet things like “he wouldnt have cheated if his wife wasnt such a bitch”, or “if only they could just be together”. And I wonder how many of the women who are saying these things are turning over to a man, who is faithful.Or how many of them are dumb enough to REALLY believe he wasn’t that “in LOVE” with his actual wife at one point in time.

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From a far, these shows look like they have some powerful women in it; journalists, white house liasons, the first lady, etc. But the women are crying in every episode, chasing men down the street, accused of stealing sperm. I guess that is as strong as women get…idk, im just sharing my thoughts on a blog.

But I just can not seem to get over the responses to this behavior. I am going to continue to watch Scandal but I am #TEAMMELLIE, #teamcommitment, #TEAM “You can act stupid if you want to but yo ass betta pull it together because you stood at that alter and vowed to commit and I dont care what kind of “love” you got for that 2 dollar tramp; till death do us part means the only way we getting out of this is in a coffin”. Those are my teams, yes the last one is a bit long, but you get my point.

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I could go on for days and sorry for not being able to really delve as deep as I want to, but as I always say this is a BLOG not a BOOK!

I just want to ask, Whats up with women? Yall really think this is okay?

I dont know, just throwing it out there. End of Rant!

-Ms. Get Right