5 Rules for Being Single

Have you ever found yourself Suddenly Single?

Leaving a relationship can sometimes feel like a time warp. Maybe you started dating your ex-husband at 35 and now that you are 53 the two of you are getting a divorce. Or even if you fell in love at 24 and a baby and some years later you find yourself single and 30. So much about yourself and your life has changed!

When you are not on the dating scene you will be surprised how different the rules are.

Here are a few tips to help you transition from Seriously Taken to Suddenly Single:

1. Announce your newly single status GRACEFULLY! Let the ones who matter most be the first to know, so that they are not finding out from a facebook status. Let them trickle the news down, as you know they will spill, even if they swore to secrecy. When YOU are ready; throw a cute pic of yourself up online with a clever caption like:”Getting back to just loving myself”.

2.If there is even a glimmer of hope for your relationship DO NOT BASH THAT PERSON ONLINE OR ANYWHERE ELSE! Sometimes you are upset about something but the two of you get over it with time and reconcile, you never know what the future holds. Imagine how stupid you will look if you have told the internet about that person having an STD (true or not). Just keep your mouth SHUT when it comes to vengeful slurs, no good will come of it.

3.Embrace your new found freedom.Get drunk, get a little crazy, reclaim your youth (or whatever years) that you spent in that relationship, no need to rush into a new one. Spend some time getting to know the new you and REFLECT so you do not make ANY of the same mistakes. But remember; Let Loose, but don’t BE LOOSE!

4.Fight the Urge to Contact. This is like the hardest part! Especially if you are used to talking to your ex-mate about everything, or if the two of you have children, OR if you have a great relationship with their family OR if you have 2947 mutual friends. But trust me it is important to clear your life.space of a person so that you can be confident in your decision to move on. Let the relationship GO if it is over.When people say “lets just be friends” they ARE NOT ready to be single and not ready to be w/o that person. So give yourself substantial time before considering a friendship w/an ex.

5.You can’t change the past, but you can have one hell of a future!Go find what you want. Do what you want. Try something new. Love louder, laugh louder, live louder. No need to tastelessly flaunt how many dates you are on or how quickly you found someone new, let your spirit show how much happier you are.

And I wish you good luck and much love.

❤

Ms. Get Right

Women Like Watching Men Cheat on their Wives

March is National Women’s HisHerstory Month, which is a great time for me to quickly let you all know about my Thursday night (I’ll tie it all together I promise).

My Thursday television line-up included Parks and Recreation, Mary Mary, and Scandal.

A few things stuck out to me while watching all this delightful programming. Each of these shows have a woman as the leading role which is great, ehhh I guess. In Parks and Rec. there have been 3 weddings (if I am counting correctly), and a host of successful relationships etc. This season of Mary Mary is focused on Tina’s husband cheating on her and last night we found out Erica’s husband might have cheated too (SPOILER ALERT!), and then there is Scandal where the whole show is rape, cheating, well you know – things that are scandalous.

As someone who is still very young and a terribly, hopeless romantic I want to get married – ONCE! I am a very loyal and committed individual who expects the same in return. Watching Mary Mary (which is a reality show) and seeing a woman BROKEN because of her husband’s infidelity makes me nervous and very sympathetic for her. Seconds later turning on Scandal to see the main character glorified for sleeping with a married man, really threw me off a bit. I know that terrible things make for great TV but what bothers me most are other women’s responses to what is depicted.

I think about BET’s Being Mary Jane, I am not a recurring viewer but I have seen ENOUGH episodes (2 to be exact) to see that the show is centered around a woman who is sleeping with or who has slept with a married man. People love that show. Week after week I see tweets and fb stats where viewers are bashing the wives, and promoting the mistress and even the cheating husband. BET even has a promotion where they are telling people to embrace their inner Mary Jane. WHAT? What does that even mean?

My favorite responses are when people tweet things like “he wouldnt have cheated if his wife wasnt such a bitch”, or “if only they could just be together”. And I wonder how many of the women who are saying these things are turning over to a man, who is faithful.Or how many of them are dumb enough to REALLY believe he wasn’t that “in LOVE” with his actual wife at one point in time.

From a far, these shows look like they have some powerful women in it; journalists, white house liasons, the first lady, etc. But the women are crying in every episode, chasing men down the street, accused of stealing sperm. I guess that is as strong as women get…idk, im just sharing my thoughts on a blog.

But I just can not seem to get over the responses to this behavior. I am going to continue to watch Scandal but I am #TEAMMELLIE, #teamcommitment, #TEAM “You can act stupid if you want to but yo ass betta pull it together because you stood at that alter and vowed to commit and I dont care what kind of “love” you got for that 2 dollar tramp; till death do us part means the only way we getting out of this is in a coffin”. Those are my teams, yes the last one is a bit long, but you get my point.

I could go on for days and sorry for not being able to really delve as deep as I want to, but as I always say this is a BLOG not a BOOK!

I just want to ask, Whats up with women? Yall really think this is okay?

I dont know, just throwing it out there. End of Rant!

-Ms. Get Right

#MotivatedMonday

HAPPY MONDAY!

Today’s Little Burst of Motivation is:

NO ONE WILL BE TALKING ABOUT YOUR FAILURES AFTER YOU SUCCEED!

If being afraid to fail is what is stopping you from going out on a limb and reaching your full potential, toss that caution to the wind. Once you actually acheive your goals that will be the main focus, not how many times you did not do what you set out to do. That goes for careers, weight loss, quitting smoking, anything in life. Keep trying, screw what the naysayers are talking about, they do not know your fate or your potential.

I believe in you, now YOU need to believe in you.

HAPPY MONDAY

❤

Ms. Get Right

 

Happy Aunt Day to Me!

Today is a super cool day for me being an aunt!

My sister’s youngest son is turning two years old today (woah time flies) and my brother is in the hospital about to welcome a baby girl into the world.

They both live states away from me so I wont be able to see my niece or my nephew today, but AUNTIE IS COMING (and so is your new cousin).

So today I am dedicating my blog to my wonderful nieces and nephews, they gave me mommy training long before I was a mom; from baby sitting and constantly getting on my nerves.

Happy Birthday Cam!

HAHA

I love them all!

❤

Aunty Get Right

 

Eating Animals vs. Smoking Cigarettes

Sorry for not posting yesterday. I was OOTO (out of the office). But hopefully today’s post makes up for things.

Eating Animals vs. Smoking Cigarettes

Which is worse for you? Which is harder to quit?

The other day my boyfriend and I were discussing our son and his current diet. At 4 months he eats rice cereal (which I initially opposed) and vegetables; and of course he drinks water and breastmilk.

Soon enough it will be time to introduce MEAT!

Now for me that was no big deal, however Dad is a vegetarian, who has been trying to get me off of meat ever since we met. But I am a carnivore who LOVES A HEARTY STEAK.

I introduced a wager. Starting the month of March he will stop smoking and I will eat NO MEAT (however I will still have seafood). If either of us is caught sneaking, then all bets are off!

Luckily for me I have been trying to cut back my calorie intake and this bet will push me to monitor my eating (and hopefully lose a couple pounds too). As far as Dad is concerned I REALLY want him to kick that stinky habit and since lung cancer doesn’t scare him; maybe the thought of his son ingesting meat will be enough for him to put down the cigarettes.

Lets see who has more will power. (I think it is me). I am excited to learn and post meat-less and filling recipes, so that is something to look forward to, i guess!

My next Post will be a review of Dinosaur BBQ, so be sure to come back tomorrow.

❤

Ms. Get Right

#MotivatedMonday

Happy Monday Everyone! For some of you today is a day off, so enjoy it and relax. For those of you getting up and out for work, school, or whatever go at it with a positive attitude NO MATTER WHAT! Sending positivity will bring you positivity.

LETS GET RIGHT TO IT!

Since today is #PresidentsDay I have a bit of inspiration from our President, Barack Obama.

“The best way to not feel hopeless is to get up and do something. Don’t wait for good things to happen to you. If you go out and make some good things happen, you will fill the world with hope, you will fill yourself with hope.”

HAPPY MONDAY

❤

Ms. Get Right

Happy Valentine’s Day

SPREAD LOVE

❤

and enjoy.

TALK TO YOU TOMORROW

-Ms. Get Right

A Bunch of Made Up Holidays

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. For some that means nothing, and for others that means WAY TOO MUCH!

Either way… I was getting my google on, as I often do; and stumbled upon a few “not so legit” holidays.

If you are looking to celebrate something, here are a few, not-so-Vday ideas for you to enjoy this time of year!

Galentine’s Day – I have fallen madly in love with the show Parks & Recreation, and Leslie Knope and her female friends and family celebrate GAL-ENTINE’S day. A day made up to enjoy the company of women to chit chat, laugh, and exchange gifts and love.

Desperation Day – staying with the TV theme; on the show How I Met Your Mother, this made up day came about. The day before Valentine’s day when women are lonely and “easy”. I wouldn’t recommend participation in this one!

Spunky Old Broads Month – Well, what can I say? Actually if you go to http://www.brownielocks.com/february.html you will find that February has a lot of weird things going on to celebrate.

and if these are not enough to have you hanging streamers and blowing up balloons, how about…

Library Lovers Day – If your anything like me, you’re thinking WOAH THERE, let me pick out a new outfit for this . -_- Seriously though, for those of you who enjoy a good trip to the library..this one’s for you =D

Get a Different Name Day -This is an official copyrighted holiday celebrated February 13th, believe it ornot/

Remember! There is nothing preventing you from starting your own traditions and creating your OWN holidays. Don’t get so wrapped up in what everyone else is doing or what you think you “should” be doing.

Happy “I LOVE READING THIS BLOG” Day

see ya tomorrow

❤

Ms. Get Right

I WILL NOT TEACH MY CHILD RACE #Blackhistorymonth

When my little brother was a few years younger than he is now, he and I went to a Chinese Restaurant. When we went inside he wanted to know  “If Chinese people are white, why don’t we just call them White people, like they call Guyanese people Black people”. To me, a high school student at the time, that was rather profound for a 4 year old.

While in college I chose to minor in African American studies. I am not sure which of the courses it was, but in one of them I read a piece by Henry Louis Gates entitled “Race as the Troupe of the World”. I will not delve deep into Plessy v. Ferguson, the true origin of man, and all that other stuff; don’t worry this is not a history lesson.

I will mention that from reading the piece, gathering my own opinions and educating myself, now that I am a mom I WILL NOT BE TEACHING MY CHILD RACE!

I will teach my son CULTURE, I will teach him history, geography, and DIVERSITY; the acceptance of difference. But when it comes to teaching him socially constructed groups based on pure prejudice and stereotype ILL PASS! I am not naive so I know the day will come when he is faced with a little questionnaire, census, or application asking him “which of these boxes do you fit in”, and  will hope that I have educated him as thoroughly as I am able on his history that he will make his own informed decision NOT LETTING SOCIETY DECIDE FOR HIM.

My help in this fight for racial equality will be raising my child (and future children) to know too much about history to be limited by race.

❤

Ms. Get Right

Perfect Inexpensive (Last Minute) Valentine’s Day Ideas

When it comes to dating, love, romance, and relationships- everyone wants a fairy tale. Unfortunately many of us who are young and in love, find ourselves BROKE and in love. As a hopeless romantic I have found myself battling with my bank account to stretch my dime far enough to put a smile on my boo’s face without leaving me in TEARS. Much like Beyonce and Jay Z, I too would like to be Drunk in Love, but sometimes my pockets sober me up REALLY FAST! So here is a guide on the Best Ways to Keep your Honey Happy on a Tight Budget.

Let’s Begin Shall We:

Spa

Everyone loves to be pampered. Put together your own little spa so that you can make your spouse feel special. This can include, but definitely not limited to: Manicures and pedicures(nail clipper, nail file, polish), oils and lotions for full body, foot, or back massages, cool refreshing drinks (with or without alcohol) or a nice warm cup of tea or hot cocoa. Be sure not to forget your bf/gf favorite candy or box of chocolates to snack on while relaxing, and a nice, soft warm blanket or robe for them to snuggle into. To top off the experience have soothing sounds playing in the background.

Courtesy of rebloggy.com

FOOD

The way to many people’s heart is through the stomach, so here are a few edible, yet affordable ideas.

Indoor Picnic – This time of a year is a bit chilly, but I still think it is worth bundling up with your special someone, picnic style. In order to make this look and feel EXTRA special: move the furniture, lay out a blanket, have a basket full of goodies (and wine of course), and light a bunch of candles or spread rose pedals. InstaRomance ❤

In Home Dinner and a Movie – Turn on the Netflix, or pop in your favorite DVD for a nice Dine-In Home Theater experience.

Breakfast in Bed – Do I even need to explain this one? To make it Valentine’s Day or Anniversary approved be sure to have a self standing tray and a vase with a few roses.

Romantic Dinner (at home) – Going out to eat can get expensive, to save a few bucks but still show your affection, whip up a 3 course meal. You can even make your own “menu” with a listing of what is to be served. Be sure to have a beautiful place setting w/ centerpiece.

Cook Together – Some great dishes to prepare together are tacos, pizza, cupcakes, and cakes. These are awesome because you can lay out the ingredients and both of you can put your favorite toppings. Hey maybe a steamy food fight will break out

WRITE IT OUT

HoneyDo Coupons – This is an old favorite, but it works. Simple redeemable coupons for your boyfriend or girlfriend to use when they want. Some coupon ideas can be sweet or spicy *wink, wink*, just remember to put “COUPONS CAN ONLY BE USED ONCE”.

Love Notes – Little post it notes with cute and encouraging messages. The trick is to hide these notes in a wallet, jacket pocket, or other surprising, frequently looked at spots. Another cute idea is to stick love notes EVERYWHERE! whether it be all over a room, laptop screen, or door; a flood of love will always be well received.

Love Letter – It may sound cheesy, but an honest and heartfelt letter can mean so much.

Craft It!

Pictures – Compile all of your favorite pix with your honey and get them printed. Then put it together in a nice collage.

Online Videos – Put together a “Our Relationship in 1minute” video on youtube. You can add pictures and videos and if you two have “a song” have that playing in the background. Nostalgia is such a sentimental touch.

Music – Maybe I am old school, but as a lover of music, it means the world to me when someone remembers all my favorite songs. Put together a nice little playlist of love songs, or your partner’s favorite songs.

…

Some of my fondest memories with my BF are cute thoughtful things he has done for me that did not take a lot of money. There are probably millions of other great ideas out there BUT no one knows better than you what you and your boo are into. So get off the computer and think about what makes him/her smile. If you have any inexpensive ideas I did not list, LET ME KNOW! Drop a comment in the box with your affordable idea.

Happy VDay!

❤

Ms. Get Right